The pattern continues...People all over the place still ignore me. So I have finally developed in my mind what "I hate you" means. It is what I wrote on forum. It was indeed directed to the whole body of forum and not to any particular person. I erased it right away but someone had read it. Of the course the someone who had read it was probably the only person on forum who really cared that I did not hate her. Because like I said...the pattern continues that I have not found one person yet who cares about me. My family cares about me but the person they care about is mom, wife, friend, sister ect. (I am not a daughter any more as my parents are dead.) I am talking about the person of me who sees things differently. The eyes of my soul are alone. Which is really weird because I view myself as a Christian.
What is shocking is this: It is my belief there are many important things that Christianity believes wrongly. I am not going to write them up here because (and this is obvious) nobody cares. That is what is shocking. So either I am not a follower of Christ Yehoshua or they are not.
Anyway, the reason I wrote "I hate you" is it did matter to me whether you live or die. Why would it? Of course it does matter but it is hard on me that there is no one who cares if the eyes of my soul live or die. That is why. That is why I wrote I hate you. I do not really hate anyone. I'm still working on reaching someone. Because....God loves you.....and I must love You too.
It feels like the inner me, the thing that makes me unique, is something that Christianity can, would, could and should do without. How else should I feel?
What is shocking is this: It is my belief there are many important things that Christianity believes wrongly. I am not going to write them up here because (and this is obvious) nobody cares. That is what is shocking. So either I am not a follower of Christ Yehoshua or they are not.
Anyway, the reason I wrote "I hate you" is it did matter to me whether you live or die. Why would it? Of course it does matter but it is hard on me that there is no one who cares if the eyes of my soul live or die. That is why. That is why I wrote I hate you. I do not really hate anyone. I'm still working on reaching someone. Because....God loves you.....and I must love You too.
It feels like the inner me, the thing that makes me unique, is something that Christianity can, would, could and should do without. How else should I feel?
Why should? Not really should. Should from the stand point of status quo. There are too many books. It would not be good. I imagine it ia called a holocaust. The definition that comes to mind is: destruction on a mass scale. Not of people. Of books. The problem is how to preserve the original message. But nobody cares. It is possible it is happening. They did not invite me. That's OK.
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